Lorna’s Listening is the resident agony aunt for both Pluto and Frequency. She’ll be answering your queries both on air and online.
I’m having trouble choosing between two guys; a Farmer and a Marine. Usually I wouldn’t choose, but they are good friends.
The Marine is hot, confident and is only here for a week, before heading back to sea. The Farmer is cute, quite shy around women, and is someone I feel I could have a relationship with, but I have no idea if he likes me above flirting.
If I go for the Marine will lose my chance with the Farmer, which may or may not exist?
Aged 20, 2nd Year Student
My gut reaction is to tell you to take the diplomatic route and not to try to come between friends. This can be a dangerous pursuit in the minefield that is the dating world, as one or both may apply the male-male equivalent of ‘sisters before misters’ (which, I cannot print, for obvious reasons.)
‘Farmer’ and ‘Marine,’ are both professions that, as well as promising an individual with a good pair of arms, (I imagine spending your days either milking cows and lifting hay bales, or pulling up the rigging, is likely to result in rather luscious limbs), scream ‘decent chap.’ Therefore, the pair may shy away from dating you, if it has the potential to create unnecessary awkwardness.
Even so, those in question may not have the sort of relationship where matters of the heart are discussed and, as my wise mother once told me, a real gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell. If they are indeed both ‘good eggs,’ they’re unlikely to brag, so in terms of ‘overlap’ you have little to worry about.
Remember that you are under no obligations and particularly not to a ‘Farmer’ about whose intentions you have expressed doubts. You are a young student, discovering life. Most do not meet ‘the one’ aged 20, so don’t go putting all your eggs in one basket, and if you’re happy to, have fun. Ultimately, the ‘Marine’ is sea-bound again soon, so whatever happens is likely to soon be forgotten – whatever floats your boat.
Tune into Lorna’s Listening every Monday at 1pm Live on Frequency Radio
If you have a problem that you would like Lorna to solve you can get in touch with here at email@example.com